Ruffled for success

“What about ruffles?” I asked my styling client who wanted to add femininity to her “nicely put-togetherness”, which consisted of pants, blouses and jackets. Her corporate job of two decades and the demand to look “professional” had taken over; she had lost her playful joy of dress ups. Her sensual femme barely had a chance to peak through at parties or dinners with the hubby.

Outfits in which we hide an important part of ourselves for a longer period of time can make us loose essential shades of our identity.

She laughed nervously. “Anything”, she said after clearing her throat, “but ruffles. They’re so girly and proper. I feel like Debbie Reynolds.”

I understood, I had a similar weird shiver when pulling out the ruffled tops at the clothing store. I love their bombastic 2019 runway expression but in real life their fragrance was that of demure wifies of the 50’s, of Diorissimo and Chanel No 5. When I was into fragrances they were called “Poison” or “Obsession” depending on my state of mind. Give me a femme fatale in Brazil not a brain reduced cutie in Stepford. It turned out both are equally challenging to me; under the demurely ruffled blouse lies the longing for the child-like sweet feminine as much as the black satin of a femme fatale holds the fear of sensuality.

It is interesting that many of us associate ruffles with smugly virtuous, well behaved females. Because their history says otherwise.

Each time I had tried ruffly dresses or blouses I had felt a shiver of nicety nice. But the ruffle sirens lured me and not only because they are a 2019 uber-trend. What I love about trends is that they invite us to reject them emotionally and when we check into our emotions and accept the dare we are surprised.

So I went for it, carefully.

When I tried the polka dot blouse with its ruffles cascading down it’s front under a frontier soldiers frock made me feel like a fierce rifle swinging boy. What the heck is masculine about ruffles?

It dawned on me; way back they had been an adornment for both, men and women. There was nothing “feminine” about them, they were theatrical uni sex “game on” for everybody. More they were statements of confidence, sometimes as in aristocratic snobbery of being better than everybody else, stiffening it up in their proud posture producing neck ruffs and other times they are connected to rebellion in our collective memory. Revolutionaries wore ruffles in various time periods and countries. When flimsily dressed courtesans needed to wear under garments in the winter they ruffled them to make them more appealing to their lovers; and the rest of the female world followed. Marie Antoinette, flappers in the 20’s and flamenco dancers in the 30’s frolicked in their frilly.

Ruffles make me feel light and easy, close to lift off…

Ruffles were fierce, voluminous, indulgent, wildly frilly, deeply decadent or simply different than the rest of their time. They were out there “I AM…. ” statements and folded themselves into every decade making waves since over 700 years counting the ruffled veils of the 14'th century.

Except in the 50’s. Ruffles became wholesome as if the 50’s were doomed to make everything “nice”. Dior and Balenciaga went for it and, paired with little pearl necklaces, ruffled dresses became the ultimate crispy Stepford wife wardrobe.

They explosive re-appearance this year fits to the motto of empowerment fashion; they are big, demanding attention and taking a breath. They demand “do not to freaking judge me!!!” I am art. I want what I want.

I am woman.

Ruffles are the perfect combination of a playful, sensual, soft female being and her theatrical forward-thinking, risk taking power. Wearing ruffles with confidence means to embrace our history; to wear our battered woman hood and the legacy of all the women standing up for our rights. The ruffle is royal and revolutionary, two sides of our powerful strength because as women we are both; wise and willful queens who are about to regain their strength and rule their queendom with creativity and love.

As they were worn by both genders, they also predict a new understanding; an elevated closeness of male and female.

Power ruffles are ultra girly, crazy avantgarde and cowgirl confident; the theater of “I am woman.”

Every break out of our routine gives us clarity of who we are and what we really want, every risk taken makes us more fierce and style is a woman’s power creating play ground.

Long live the power ruffle.

I picked exquisite ruffle designs for you from low to high prices, small and big designers. Enjoy. Test one if you haven’t already and discover your surprise.
I especially love No 1, such amazing theater for so little money.

Do you have a favorite?

Super exciting stylish buy

Stella McCartney Ruffle One-Shoulder Cotton Blouse

Sipaya

BCBG MAX AZRIA

ECI

MOON RIVER

Bella Flore only $19.99

STATE Tiered Ruffled Top

JED Women's Loose Fit Keyhole Neck Ruffled Sweater Fabric Top by Jed

Vince Camuto

ROMEO & JULIET COUTURE

Romeo and Juliet Couture

Karen Kane

Ella Moss

Cotton Mood

Alexander Wang Silk Ruffle-Accented Top

Stella McCartney Star-print silk-blend top

Alexander McQueen

Alexander McQueen

Alexander McQueen

Alexander McQueen Ruffled poplin top

Alexander McQueen Ruffled silk-crepe top

Alexander McQueen

Alexander McQueenruffled top fitted dress

Barney's NY

Prada Ruffle Colorblocked Leather Top $$$$$

See all Images J KOO

Transparent outfits are a metaphor for #authenticity

I like the mysterious touch of sheer and medieval layering.

“Before I knew you, I wasn’t this nice,” I said live in a FB group with 10,00 women followers. I was high on being seen and accepted during a women’s brunch in Redondo Beach. So I spilled a couple beans. In my journey through judgements I had turned myself around; instead of judging I saw the beauty in every one of the women in my groups, okay in most. When we don’t judge the fear of being judged shrinks.

“I have been called a bitch,” I continued. It was a freeing, hilarious moment as nobody, me included, had expected it.

I was wearing what some might call a bit of a risqué outfit; a snake print mini skirt over patterned fishnet stocking and over the knee shiny boots, a sheer top over a shiny faux leather bustier and a transparent long sleeve maxi dress veiling it all. I like the mysterious touch of sheer and medieval layering.

My choice was a result of my months long journey into authenticity and foreshadowed my moment of truth. The black multilayered outfit, which I had chosen consciously as a statement of both my strength and need of protection, empowered me like a subliminal message; “be transparent.”

It was not just telling a tidbit of my truth but also acting on my feelings; to hug women without knowing if they would like it or hug me back. I embodied my feelings without letting fear and doubt be in the way. It had often before kept me in “wait and see’ mode; show me first that you like me… But if everybody waits we don’t get to know each other.

When our “second skin” becomes a part of our daily creativity we communicate with deeper parts of ourselves open to receive winks from our inner knowing. In that moment we are also linked to the Zeitgeist, picking up and being uplifted by what’s in the air. Empowerment is becoming a world wide motto since millions of women marched for their liberation in 2017, following a long tradition of protests organized by women and now showing in many of the designers amazing art.

It’s a powerful dynamic; fashion designers reflect on and express our desires to be fiercely unique and in return, when manifested in their outfits, support our goal with their design.

The hastag #authentic has 9.2 million followers.

Even in LA where people are used to a lot of fashion extravaganza showing my bra or bustier under a transparent top is an act of bravery and makes life into a runway. Like a model we have to adapt a new way of walking, the empowered walk of straight up confidence. It doesn’t work every day; it’s more like exercising woman power.

Tip 1 from the fearless front

Make an appointment with yourself like going to the gym with the mantra “today I exercise my femininity”. Art openings, theater premieres or performance art are perfect occasions for your tests. People anywhere in the world are much more likely to love and not judge what you wear expressing your self amidst arty vibes.

Tip 2

Watch your feelings, let your dare empower but also talk to you. Are there any memories, images, ideas or judgement coming up? Let them guide you. Hand writing your experience can give you insights into your deeper stories.

For me it always was either hiding or being my sensual self. Experimenting with low cut dresses and bustiers like courtesans in the 16th century or Madonna in the eighties provoked my fierce; each dare rattled one of my accumulated fears and beliefs. I have a deep connection to medieval times and the story of a courtesan since I lived in Portugal and experienced “weird” memories and researched a mysterious story. When I followed the winks and hints of my intuitive dress ups over the years I saw the archetype of the courtesan showing up several times - and each time I ran. For me it’s time to dive into her story. Is it time to watch your inner movies?

If you are interested in your very own challenge outfit I’d love to guide you into your desire or fear to be truthful and authentic. There’s so much more than what we have learned to see in daily life. We will use playful dress ups with the happy end (and beginning) of a sheer outfit carefully selected for you.

Contact me for your adventurous outfit challenge.

Sheer is also an expression of our sensuality. How far do we want to go? What does it mean to be a “dangerous woman” and prosecuted for our powers for centuries? More about the risks of sensuality coming up soon.

I found a couple exquisite items for your exploration into transparency.

Click to buy.

And a few more…

I always loved the sensual in demure…

https://rstyle.me/~cz-aO4wO

Challenge outfits, dress up for empowerment

“You can’t wear shorts, mom,” said my teenage son rolling his eyes, “please!!”

That was 14 years ago. I didn’t. Last week they became my challenge outfit. I went to TopShop. I tried. I loved. I bought. HOT PANTS. Those tiny things I wore in the seventies.

I took a deep, deep breath and wore them on the streets of LA a week ago. My 28 year old son applauded me from the depths of his Millennial cool.

“Hot pants” are one of my challenge outfits as it pokes my worry of being “too much, too loud, too silly” and going deeper it is my fear of being judged an “easy woman”, in my medieval memories I was burnt on a stake as the wild and free “la putain”.

“Dolls Kill”, the teenie bopper store for “Misfits and Miss Legits”, provided the cute sheer top.

Of course this moment of empowerment has a story.

It started with “Look at us.”

For our afternoon meet in a Pasadena cafe Barbara Holmes and Loretta Sayers both coincidentally dressed in comfy plaid. I came in a pink jumpsuit. “Sure, you did.” We laughed. Barbara pointed under the table, where even our sneakers told the same story; comfy, comfy, trendy and not so comfy.

“Let’s play dressing you up, ladies”

After my yearlong, sometimes careful and other times over the top outfit journey it was time to be a siren and call others to the stage.

“ReBelle your authentic inner beauty.”

“How?” asked my friend Barbara who is known as Barbie.

“We are like like scientists; we experiment,” I answered.

“Let’s ReBelle Barbie.”

We did. We evoked our inner tomboys with bib overalls. We slipped into long coats and played the Matrix, “We know Kung Fu.” I convinced Barbie to try a jumpsuit, (see below) which women often feel they shouldn’t do or can’t fit in. I love the jumpsuit’s Barbarella power and feel that every woman should have one. I want to own 365 one day:)

We successfully re-belled Barbie, her inner child loved to play and her feminine power was high lighted. Both of us had a blast.

That’s when I got the idea of challenge outfits.

I went on a hunt, let my intuition take over and mailed Loretta her challenge; a trendy metallic pencil skirt.

Loretta says, “At first I felt awkward.. But within minutes I felt empowered. I started to think that just maybe I could pull this off. I felt pretty yet powerful. After texting Angie a photo, we chatted for a bit and she helped me come up with this: I felt like a Goddess rising from the ashes of a ruined castle. “ The outfit inspired Loretta to the beautiful ruins of Knapps Castle.
”Boom! 💥” she wrote.

Outfits are feelings. On my designer hunting trip through LA I discovered a piece for hiking girl Patrice.

Patrice says on her blog, “my style is usually more on the conservative side,  my idea of being rebellious is wearing red or a statement piece of jewelry… Angie… sent me something that would blend a “little sexiness with my healthy hiking style.” Her exact words. The moment my jacket arrived, I almost screamed with joy.  It was so pretty, so interesting and somehow, so me!  That is what good stylists do, they help you express  yourself in unexpected ways. Angie thank you for helping me find my “inner rebel”  I will be allowing this side of me to come out more often!”

Boom No 2 and 3💥

Outfits talk.

Outfits aren’t just something we throw on to hide or to impress, they can be the best sidekicks to discovering stories about ourselves we might have forgotten or did not dare to look at, and they’re always empowering when we play. They are mother’s little helper to crack the style box or mindset we might not be so happily stuck in after all.

#metoo, said my next “power girl to be” using the formerly dark and depressing hashtag in a newly transformed empowering way. The journey with Rebecca from “Are you ready to organize” has begun. She mixes and matches women and junior sizes from 4 - 10 to fit her body shape perfectly. As a fashionista I dreamt of the easy way out; can I please be a size Zero, be skinny and wear everything? But then, where’s the creative fun in that? As a teenager I popped pills to stay under 100 pounds. In my 50’s being a size 6 going up to size 8 I stopped buying clothes, which made me so unhappy that I stopped eating or having champagne after my stressful job. Just saying; I come from a lifelong fight with body issues and self acceptance. Today I swagger between 2 and 4 and have the mix and match, improvising and innovating fun I loved all my life. I am happy when I can create.

To accept and love challenges means to be in for personal expansion. “We don’t groe old, we grow,” I wrote three years ago when the Ageless Rebellion started.

On my journey to find tops for busty women I got into plus sizes. After scrolling through the first ten online stores my rebel was awakened. Where are sizes 10 and up in the sexy, trendy-cool sections? What the heck is this need to call women over 50 and over size 8 “MATURE” and make them hide their assets? Come back to read the story.

Some women say life begins at 50. I’m a late boomer, I “woke late” to be my inner hurricane; I started to write my new story at 60.

Outfits truly were my sword swinging sidekick on the road to ageless.

Let’s play dress up, ladies; get your challenge outfits.

The age of empowerment fashion

“Would you like to dance with me?”

I put my Tequila shot down. I was a country dance newbie and being asked by the maestro of the two-step scene of Santa Fe evoked goose bumps.

“I am honored”, I answered smiling brightly. It was the 90’s and I studied art therapy at the South Western College, a program based on the amazing work of Carl Jung; life changing in its vibrant archetypal approach. I slid off the bar stool and my Harley Davidson cowgirl boots hit the polished floor with a metallic “clack”. “You can do this,” they said. I had learned that things can be imbued with thoughts of strength and resolve. Cowgirl boots were my “power objects”.

I love to look back at my life and discover foreshadowing of the finest; fashion had weaved itself into my life like a repeated reminder of where I was going even when I built houses for a living. It’s two decades after finding courage in cowgirl boots and I am a style coach using outfits for clarity and empowerment.

“We wear our soul on our sleeves
A.W.

”

The Ageless Rebellion started three years ago with WE WEAR WHAT WE WANT and say what we feel. Now woman power has landed on designer’s desks with more than a little metallic “clack”; it’s a closer to a revolution. If we use it as such.

Fashion is born in our Zeitgeist.

Women marches and hastags like “Metoo #enoughisenough and #womenpower have saturated the air we breathe and changed the outfit climate. Vegan fashion week and Fashion Revolution Week hopefully can help reduce the threat of climate change before it’s too late.

Designers have called 2019 the year of fashion empowerment.

For decades the industry was a dictatorship for many women or, on the other end, caused resistance and fights against it. Today our demands have changed fashion into a democracy. Designers like Nili Lotan even use the “right to choose” as theme of their collection; she creates “separates” with the call to “make your own outfit."

"I really do design for myself," said Nili in an interview with W. She is 59 and doesn’t only own her storefront on Duane Street and studio space on Walker in NYC’s Tribeca but her place in the industry. "I’m a real woman: I have kids, I have a husband, I travel, I work, I entertain—I do all the things we all do. My clothes are the answer to my life, and I think that's why so many women see them as the answer, too.”

Hastag #authentic has 9.2 million followers

If ever a designer was made for the #MeToo moment it would be Miuccia Prada, a woman who has spent her career exploring the shifting, often uncomfortable, balance between femininity and force. Or, as she put it: “The whole point of my job is trying to understand how women can be powerful but also feminine, and be believed and stay respected when everyone assumes those things mean you don’t care about clothes.”

Messages from deep thoughts, 528HZ is the sound frequency of love, to in-your-face calls to action were recently put on a pedestal by Victor&Rolf’s fantastic theatrical dresses.

Women’s liberation is everywhere, expressed in Pantone Colors, which are decidedly optimistic, vibrant or peace evoking, in combat boots, sexy warrioress faux leather, scandalous vinyl or slogan T-shirts with female empowerment messages. They are everywhere now from the “We Should All be Feminists” T-Shirt on the catwalk at Christian Dior to the myriad versions sold for International Women’s Day. Christopher Kane has always harnessed a lot of criticism for feminist “propaganda” and designers like Christian Siriano, Chromat, Eckhaus Latta, and Gypsy Sport also go further than their seams by sending a variety of body types down the runway, while PH5, Creatures of Comfort, and Kes all included “real” women in their shows.

The very slowly accepted plethora of body types, all ages and races and their manifestation in styles as different as Mars and Venus is a testament to our need for tolerance of our differences.

It is a democratic treasure chest; slip into an uber feminine Zac Posen and wear it with Dior’s 60’s protest sign clothing, wear combat boots with bonbon colors and ruffles, high heels with work woman overalls and glam in sequins in the day time. Layer like the multi level personality you are and let your outfits do the talking. Wear rubber boots with drawstring nylon tops, fishnet tops under massive pleather coats with faux-fur cuffs, frivolous bustiers under shy sheer cream colors, let fringing fiercely swing into your day and metal colors make you feel strong. Let your curious inner child play with bows and bio degradable plastic. Use tulle under or over, sheer or embellished with jewels or flowers.

Pull yourself out of the rut with pulling your neckline off-center.

Be brave. Whatever that means to you.



The industry hits the jack pot by using our zooming in on our hastags and using buzzwords to sell their collections but then, even if some designers only “mean it” commercially it is our responsibility to use these trends as our mantras and statements.

Womanhood is a gift, a privilege and a pleasure. To know and believe that is power and comes with the responsibility to make it so for all of us.

Courage to me is to be authentic and real. To discover “me” and own me. It took me three years from the moment I used the slogan “be a badass at any age” to today where I finally know what that really means. Woke to me means to step into our slogans and into outfits that mean it and mean ME.

How we relate to our outfits is deeply personal and that’s where it starts; make it PERSONAL, really personal.

What empowers me might not empower you.

It is your journey towards your power that counts.

“What does this matter to me?
”

When you dress up ask with Marie Kondo “Does this bring me love?” and with me “what does this matter to me?” Does this resonate with my heart? My soul? My mood? Does it express the power I need today? Vibe the frequency of people I want to meet? Does this shout or whisper my message?

I love to see the beauty in empowerment fashion but worldwide women power is far from reality. The democracy of fashion is in her baby shoes; our task is to push it further, wider and give every woman her power objects until we all believe that we ARE power.

We have to stop running to authority and let big institutions decide for us; it has not brought us far, better it is bringing us to the moment of extinction. When we let our peers teach, motivate and inspire us, when we listen to the voices next to us, buy from our friends and not billionaire’s owning the world we have a chance to make this a world for the people.

Join me in telling fashion stories that empower creating real democracy in real life.

#womeninspiringwomen

Athleisure, sequins, transparent fabrics, feathers, bold pop colors, combat boots, faux leather, over the knee boots and the easy version of message tees… come back to my empowering fashion pics.
”Ruffle it” is next.

Ageless Rebel in the Forever Fierce Revolution

When you own the power of truth…

“A rebel is anger on steroids,” said my college friend Dieter. He should know, I thought. He had been the feisty singer of a punk band in what he describes as an “NYC ghetto” at a time when Patti Smith, David Bowie and Lou Reed climbed to fame.

Against his warning I still named my movement “The Ageless Rebellion”, this was three years ago. I was proud to be a rebel, always fought against political or social imbalance, for the underdog, women’s rights or acted against the attacks on our environment. “There’s this other women group,” I told him, “the “Forever Fierce Revolution”, they have revolution in their name also.”

“I have the right to be angry,” I thought, “there’s so much in this world to be upset about.”

I was angry with anything unfair because my life had been unfair; I was “just a girl” and as such too sensitive. As a misguided tomboy I was too loud; I was simply too much, not worthy to be loved. Writing the story of my decades of rebellions I saw how I had fiercely and mostly successfully fought for my right to be as creative as artists and as powerful as business men, but that in my fights were the tears of an angry child feeling abandoned and powerless. Anger is born in disappointment and sadness; when I entered that part of my truth my world began to change. I sat in it. I cried.

Anger becomes enlightening when we make it a journey, a starting point not a status.

“Transform your crap into gold” was my “I show you, world” motto.

Self love had been a unknown mystery to me. My life coach made me dig for it; I needed not just a shovel but an ice pick. The moment I told my mirror image “I love you” without a sarcastic grin was magical awakening to the deeper levels of me. I now had the power to go back to the beginning; to my dreams, my innocence, my childlike curiosity and passionate love for life. I had the power to change. Not the world outside of me but my thoughts, my feelings; my story. Every tantrum and every one of my fights held a pearl of wisdom; what I truly longed for. My No contained the hidden story of my yes.

“ReBelles,” I wrote in my group, “let’s re-claim our true inner and outer beauty.”

I now used the power of No as a tool to eliminate what hindered me to manifest ME, to be present in my “real”. I finally entered what I had called “ageless” as my answer to ageism. “There is no age.” The full meaning of ageless though revealed itself in my journey; it is the sacred space where time does not exist, where we are pure essence and see the world without preconceived notions.

When we’re not trained like Eckhard Tolle though we usually don’t stay in the “present” for too long, we’re in and out and each time we’re “in” we get another glimpse of who we truly are like gifts from our inner goddesses.

To be authentic isn’t done by saying so, it is a journey with hick ups and ripping bandages off with whimpers or screams.

Writing the memoir of my rebellions I had watched the movie of my life and how the different voices inside of me had manifested in my outside world; my judgements and doubts but also my power and compassion and my search for love. I was deeply touched by what I had not noticed before; that life had always been on my side and my own beliefs let me reject it. I would go back to the beginning; to be childlike and trusting. A rebel for a wonderful world where women virtues rule and the planet is safe from greed…

“Seriously?” asked my inner critic rolling his eyes.

“What’s with that silly dream to be 16 again?” a woman I hoped to be friends with asked. “Why the heck are you so childish? And why would you want to change the world? That’s really stupid.”

Watch out, babes. On the path to our inner freedom we get tested; do you still believe that “you’re not okay the way you are, dear” ?

I finally said NO. I left the stage of guilt and fear.

NO is power when we become rebels for the truth of us. Anger is healthy when it is transformed into awareness of what we really want and make it happen.

Anger is the fire that burns the bullshit we have let ourselves accept and believe; all what’s left in the ashes is the magical dragon of our truth.

In my social media journeys I discovered that as much as I theoretically had disliked comparison and competition I compared myself to others; I was either better or less. I became a watch dog of my jealousies and entitlements; I was to own what really mattered to me, to walk my talk and step into the shoes of my fearless Instagram avatar. Not only that; on my fashion therapy adventures I literally stepped into the mindset of styles; I got to be the hippie, the goddess, the yuppie, the boss babe or sexy Barbie. I got to understand and appreciate more facets of the female mindset every day.

Repetition is a master of change; when we love who we are we love the women around us as equals, every day a little more.

Three years ago my FB group, Ageless Rebel, had been an initiative of “me against ageism”. The Forever Fierce group was a team creation of fifty fierce female bloggers making the world prettier, friendlier, happier. I liked their women virtues but I was “different” than them. I was a rebel, my movement gave aging the finger. They weren’t rebellious enough. They were much too nice for my taste. Nice made me suspicious.. Why did they call me darling?

Meeting 80 of them in real life last October was a revelation; some of the women had the same fears entering the conference as me and many of them really meant their hugs. I felt my doubts, suspicion and judgments shrinking. I wasn’t as “pink” as them was I?

Unconditional women communities celebrate our uniqueness, I stated, feeling “different” though was separation.

On outings with my new and re-discovered “old” women friends in LA, with Barbie, Loretta, Mindy, Teresa, Elizabeth, Rita, Rosanne… we played dress up and got to be 16 again, spun stories, made plans or traveled into the myths of our past. I listened. I asked. I saw them without the filter of needs or wants. They reciprocated but seeing me and not only that they asked me to be who I was. My childlike enthusiasm as much as my fierce Rebelle power were encouraged not condemned. I was inspiring others, how amazing was that.

In the middle of February, right after the official love day of Valentine’s 2019, I playfully and effortlessly fessed up to one of my secrets in a live conversation broadcast to the 6000 member strong group Forever Fierce group.

“I wasn’t this nice before I met you girls…” The group had helped me to re-discover the sweet girl who allows herself to love pink. Thank you. What a relief when you can say thank you from your heart.

Freedom is not to have agendas.

The sweetness of others can wear you down. I couldn’t stop smiling; I had arrived. I felt liberated from my inner bullies. All what was left in the ashes of my past at this moment was the magical dragon of MY truth. I met women’s eyes thinking; I see you, I love you. I meant it.

I am what I see in others.

Self love gives us permission to be everything we are; even the parts of our past we wanna kick to the curb. It’s our journey that made us and the journey wants to be embraced like everything and everybody else.

Love is our medicine; kindness is an alchemical potion.

Please go ahead; call me darling and tell everybody that you love them even if you only mean it a little bit. Being kind to somebody today might change their world.

“Joy is contagious”, commented my friend Sophie Davis. “That’s it right there,” I responded. “A new kind of rebellion.”

I remembered a quote I had made up last year.

“In a society ruled by fear and anger every conscious smile is a rebellion
”

I am a pink rebel in a pink revolution. What better than to be warrioresses for love, together.

Squats with hand bags. Styling Journeys from the Soul.

“I’d love a little adventure,” Barbie said to my idea of finding a challenging outfit that would disrupt and uplift her style.

I decided on two outfits that wouldn’t push her to the edge but just with little extra that opens doors not scare the heck out of her. The first, a black Zara jumpsuit, a versatile piece that could be sassy or fun depending on the accessories was a success as most women think that jumpsuits wouldn’t fit their body shape or are too 70’s or too millennial. But what really hit our first jack pot was her leopard overall.

My motto was PLAY.

Who’s reading my blogs knows that I am a fan of Baudelaire’s philosophy of child play; to be fully immersed in the moment with all the openness and intensity a child can have.

To match the theme I got into one of my own overalls and because we wanted to evoke the inner girly girls we added pink accessories.

“Really?” smirked our little ones and after a short warm up period they went for it, we laughed and danced and did squats with handbags - on Sunset Boulevard.

We met at “Dinosaur Cafe” in Hollywood, a lively cafe for creatives and a name that fit; most kids love the magic of Dinosaurs.

What often happens to me; when in a space of non-judgmental freedom other ideas fly in, I call it “the universe talks to me.”

Both of us had brought a long coat by “accident”, coats that didn’t have the vibe of child play at all. Slipping into our coats transported us into the Matrix, avoiding flying bullets with our smooth moves.

Both of us had studied Kung Fu in our past. One of the women I would like to embody is Sarah Connor from the Terminator; the metaphor of the sassy warrioress has been with me since decades; I always felt I came from the future on a mission to save the world.

We entered the creative space of outfit inspiration by being in the moment of high school girl friends but our feminine power lifted her fist; babes, you’re also magical and strong. I always loved the quote from Buffy, the Vampire Slayer; the girly thing to do is “to date and shop and hang out and go to school and save the world from unspeakable evil.”

Outfits are so much more than trends or decor, they can be like meditation; a path to our deeper knowing and an amazing practice of “letting go what we think we know”. What could be more fun than dress up to get to know new shades of ourselves , even our magic?

The power of outfits is to guide us inside but also into the outside world; where would an overall bring you to? Who would “see you” and resonate with you?

Do we see new aspects of the world in different, and for us unusual outfits?

Come back for some fun with our next journeys…

Check out this look from LIKEtoKNOW.it http://liketk.it/2zUrP
Download the LIKEtoKNOW.it app to Shop Your Screenshots™

9 tips on comfort in sexy heels

They called me a gazelle in my early thirties as I climbed over the rubble of the construction sites I managed in high heels. I had a dozen pairs of the same brand in all available colors; they had to be repaired or substituted rather often. I was obsessed with two power objects; my heels and my lipstick. “I’m not going out without them!”

I am still a lipstick lover and own the coolest heels; they are so pretty for photo shoots. Walking in them for longer than an hour though often feels like a torture trip .

Talking to a friend of mine who is a shoe designer for several big brands, he told me not only about the fierce and sometimes brutal competition behind the scenes but also that most designers don’t care much about about how comfy the shoes are; if they look hot they’re fine.

“If you want to be beautiful you’ll have to suffer,” my mom always said.

No, thanks.

I could go through a feminist list of why not to buy into heels but heck, I love them. Perhaps I am brainwashed or it’s ingrained into my genes but sometimes a woman just has to do what she wants even against her lofty theories of empowerment.

Heels make me FEEL empowered and isn’t mindset everything? I love power objects as my psychological sassy crutch.

As I can’t can’t live without ’em how can I live with them without pain?

1. Educate Yourself on Your Foot Type

I have never been to a podiatrist to understand my foot type, I have a regular arched foot. But checking how high arched or flat your foot helps with adding insoles. In my area the CVS pharmacies have DR. SCHOLL’S CUSTOM FIT KIOSK LOCATOR where you can get the perfect insoles.

2. Use insoles

Get your insoles, DR. SCHOLL’S actually really works in my experience, the company exists since decades and I trust their experience. They have all kinds of help from a moleskin, a soft cotton flannel insert with adhesive backing to gel heel liners. Ball of the foot pads for example are oval-shaped pads that go under the ball of the foot, usually made from a silicone gel. They hold your foot more steady in the shoe, prevent sliding forward, stabilize your stride and protect your toes from blisters.

Some women use sandpaper to stop their feet form sliding. Looks like a great emergency measure when insoles or “foot petals tip toes” aren’t readily available

3. Opt for Platform Soles

A thicker sole offsets some of the pressure when you’re walking. My heels with thick and rubbery soles are close to comfy.

4. Avoid stilettos, go for a chunkier heel style

I love booties and boots, which gets me to point 5

5. Go for top coverage

The more coverage you have on the top of your foot, the better. Boots are perfect. Ankle straps or big wide straps help when you wear summer heels.

6. Take breaks and stretch your feet

7. Break your new shoes in with a hair dryer

Wear your new shoes in the house with socks, and apply heat with a blow dryer to loosen up tight spots.

8. Use the magic of tape

Tape is a magical helper in many clothing emergencies. Taping your third and fourth toes (counting from the big toe) is supposed to help as there is a nerve between those two, which causes pain when pressure is put on it. Not tested by me.

9. Try wedges.

There are sassy looking ones out there and they’re comfy.

Already Blistered?

Keep your bliss using Band Aid blister healing pads

What’s your experience with heels? Do you have trick that work for you?

Happy balancing.

Check on Harper’s Bazaar’s cool show stories.

On a side note; my blog on “how to make trends work” for empowerment mentioned that we are part of the trends; they’re not created for us but with our thoughts, desires and lifestyles, they follow our evolution.

See the trend of chunky punk work boots; they are a perfect answer to and expression of women marches and women power.

What can trends do for us?

“Why is everybody staring at me?” my friend panicked when walking through a luxurious hotel lobby in Los Angeles. Half of the women on our meet up were fashion fabulous. “Gawd. It’s because my pants are from last year,” she answered herself.

“You look great”, I countered, “ don’t be a slave to trends.”

“Snake pants are out,” she shivered in her realization that she had not paid attention.

“Your pants express who you are, don’t they?” I asked but she didn’t feel it, her decision in the morning had been “ so stupid.”

“Why do I act careless like this?” she questioned her choice and every careless decision in her entire life right after.

“We are midlife power chicks.” I tried to make it better and added firmly that,“we should be over this and be confident no matter what…”

“Words,” she grinned sarcastically knowing my mirror obsessions.

I wore black jeans, a silver shirt, a black, loose fitting blazer and classy Jeffrey Campbell boots; I was trend-washed. As I always have extra clothes flying around in my car, changing into straightforward Free People jeans calmed my friend’s mood.

Outfits had empowered or depressed me depending on the phase of life I was in. At this time I was in one of my rebel modes and into wear what you want, be who you are. “Be a badass at any age,” was my website slogan. I would not conform to another person's idea of what is socially acceptable. We shouldn't lose our identity whenever a new style hits the market.

What do we hold against commercial trends?

1.     “Conformity; everybody wears the same.” Boring.

2.     “Must have brand new outfits every season.” Eco-unfriendly, consumerist.

3.     “Needing to follow trends empties your bank account.” Dangerous.

4.     “Trends are to impress others.” Narcissistic. Weak.

5.     “Trends are about designers not about us.” We are following somebody’s idea of what’s cool. Who wants to be a sheep?

6.     “The fashion industry is a scary often unethical business with unsustainable practices and a manipulative gang of marketers.” Revolution needed.

7.     “Trends create judgmental eye rolling fashionistas.” That hurts.

Two years later, after my memoir writing journey followed by a therapy-style fashion adventure through many different outfits it dawned on me that my “rebel style” wasn’t that revolutionary, it had become limiting. I was safe in my black box and it was easy to throw stones from there. New styles had opened me up to different feelings and levels of myself and other women.

I browsed Glamour, Vogue, Bazaar and W and rejoiced in the beauty of runway art.

Trends are just the same, I thought; they are fashion’s agent provocateurs to get us out of our boxes.

We switch “what can I do for trends” to “what can trends do for me?”

Are we staying in the comfortable same old style because we’re scared, because we don’t really want to be seen? I wanted to make a point; midlife women are fab, informed and relevant. We have a wealth of experiences and lots of crazy cool stories to tell. To be convincing means to be “in time,” here and now and not in outfits that say “I don’t care.”

You can’t look like yesterday’s news if you want to influence the world of tomorrow.

DARE YOU…

Trends can be tools to test our boundaries and weaknesses, our comfort zones as much as our daring spirit; to “try new things” should not stop at our looks.

Trends are tests of our confidence

1.     We risks new styles and find out if and what they might do for us

2.     We say No do what doesn’t make sense to us and don’t squeeze our butts into shorts if our body shape dislikes them

3.     We hold the outfit in our hand and. seriously, ask “Will you make me happy?”

4.     We ask ourselves what a particular style will say about us and if it is what we really want tell the world about us

Trends are tests of our creativity

1.     We make them ours by adding our own signature

2.     We innovate;

-  mix trendy new outfits with last years

-  add bigger ruffles or big bows to blouses

-   throw tulle and sheer fabrics over last years dresses

-   sequin up old jeans

-   add “real” vintage, which in our time is everything before 2000

-   add handmade outfits from creatives and small designers

-   buy once before loved designer trends at Shop ReBelle

If you can sew, invite your women friends and make new clothes out of the old; everybody will have something cool to contribute and who knows, you might create amazingness

Like this trends become affordable and we step out of blind consumerism.

Letting trends inspire us to our authentic, unique selves makes them empowering; we dress to express who we are not to impress others.

When we ask where our clothes were made and buy from ethical companies we help change the world.

Last; the idea that trends are about designers and not us is sometimes valid but we can see this differently also.

Designers don’t live on clouds; they live in the world, in the same Zeitgeist like us, more, to create fashion lots of detailed research is conducted; underground ideas, life styles, empowerment movements or social media accounts, what we talk about and desire makes the next trend.

Designers manifest what society feels, sometimes what society needs; they are part of our creative expression and we are an integral part of their’s.

I don’t call myself an influencer, yet I started adding pleather, vinyl and vegan materials to my faux fur collection years ago. Now faux is a must. Cool, so I’ve already got some stuff. I also got little suits and oversized blazers and huge sweaters before we “had to have them.” I wore my son’s big shirts for photo shoots two years ago… We anticipate what’s “in” or coming.

Let’s make OUR trends while playing with popular trends. What is our MORE? What is our desire to embody? Isn’t a true “influencer” the intuitive who co-creates trends?

In my next blogs I’ll talk about trends that I find inspiring, how I modify them and what they could possibly mean to you.