If I gave you diamonds and pearls
Would you be a happy boy or a girl
If I could I would give you the world
But all I can do is just offer you my love…
I balanced on the balcony on a beautifully carved white chair battered by weather and squirrels finding its upholstery perfect for their nests. The Instagram challenge of “Diamonds and Pearls” by Prince caused a mini explosion; I clowned around, happy not to think about viruses, conspiracies or people dying.
I’m not a diamond girl, I never even had a diamond engagement ring. I don’t own any expensive pearls either. This was so not me. That’s why it was so much fun.
My inner wardrobe stylist makes me do the weirdest things, she spins outfit ideas into mini revelations. Diamond and pearls grew into a styling story with four acts, body, soul, mind and spirit.
How to make more out of your outfits and let them tell you about yourself?
Start innocently; no thoughts, no judgments, curious and open. Let your style guide you.
Act 1 Body - a spontaneous reaction of physical joy
Play.
Diamonds and pearls? Me? I’m in for a quick laugh. I fooled around in a boss chick suit jacket on naked skin adorned with pearls. Look at me, I’m not taking this seriously. This is the comeback of my giggle after deep, dark pandemic pondering for weeks.
Act 2 Soul - heart-opening feelings
Feel.
Me, me, me, chose me. A snake print romper, which I got a week before quarantine, called, pleeease, choose me. My clothes are like kids sometimes, old souls who know what I need. The pearls on my red romper clacked softly yet royally fierce. My pink transparency booties said, Go for it!
Carefully on my high heels I climbed up the stairs to the balcony, a wooden piece of street art under one arm, my tripod under the other. The plan; to reminisce the streets of LA I love so much, the alleyways with underground art, the beauty of decay, the messages of rebellious artists…. my former fashion life on tangible streets.
I stretched my legs and tested if the metal frame of the balcony would hold me. I didn’t intellectualize what I did or how it looked. When we forget everything we know and feel our body in textures, forms and colors they pull us into the magic of now. That’s where the stories live. I forgot about the street art. This was about something else.
Giving up on “normal” and opening up to “weird,” defined as supernatural and uncanny, we discover our more.
I do my styling and photo shoots like I live my live; curious and with suspension of disbelief. When I watch a movie, I stuff cinematic knowledge under the sofa. If I decide on a TV show I let myself fall into it. Actors not in tune with their role will ruin it for me, so I am always right there with the outfit. Diamond and pearls… Grace Kelly, Marilyn, Madonna and Doll Theresa joined me.
- Girls just want to have fun - Cyndi Lauper flew in.
I come home in the morning light
My mother says, “When you gonna live your life right?”
Oh mother dear we’re not the fortunate ones
And girls, they wanna have fun…
I happily engaged in what I, a head case, had judged for decades; simple “brainless” girly fun and “vain“ women dripping with jewelry. Swirling pearls, I admitted I love superficial fun. I love to be a girl jumping up and down with excitement. I sparkle like a diamond when in women’s groups, girlfriends weren’t allowed; I didn’t have one until I free’d myself from my mother’s fears in college. Fashion connected me, styling outfits made me relatable. Allowing myself to present all shades of my contradictory, as much pink as punk self, I met smart, passionate, rebellious, open minded fashionistas for whom styling is their art and empowerment. “Your vibe attracts your tribe.” So true. We transform outfits into tools, rise from slaves of trends to creatresses.
Judgment flew in.
Nobody ever gave you a diamond ring. You’re not valuated as a woman
Some boys take a beautiful girl
And hide her away from the rest of the world
I want to be the one to walk in the sun
Oh girls just wanna have fun.
Would a diamond ring have made me happy? Did I miss out that nobody went to Jared for me?
The obsession with “walking in the sun,” with my independence, had structured my life for decades. I would have laughed or slapped a man for daring to propose to me.
“I donated my engagement ring to a home shelter after my nasty divorce,” a friend answered my pondering.
No, I don’t miss marriage or a diamond to prove love. I looked at the crystal brooch holding one of my pearl strands. The Los Angeles sun let its little laser beams hit my heart; it hurt. I had missed out on my dream; the all consuming, passionate, eternal love story. My desire for independence had been my emotional prison.
Act 3 Mind - the intellectual dig into the story of stuff
Think.
Diamonds and pearls are Earth gifts to us, but their values are man made. Their given value created a history of greed, exploitation, pain and blood shed.
My former wedding business website offered artificial diamonds and ethical gemstone alternatives. It was the time of Brad Pitt starring in Blood Diamond. After watching the horrors of the diamond trade, brides were more open to change from the traditional diamond to a new option. Instead of supporting a gruesome industry, some reused old family jewelry to design uniquely personal rings and wear their family tradition on their finger.
Pearls do not begin their journey beautifully either. An irritant enters an oyster and causes it pain and discomfort. The oyster coats it again and again with layers of nacre and, eventually, a pearl is formed.
The analogy to how we humans deal with our pain is amazing; we put more and more coating on it not to feel it. Our longing to free ourselves from the pain grows exponentially and will explode one day; we wake up, transform it to awareness, let it go and change our lives. Or, if we don’t, it materializes in an accident, illness, disease or other type of painful misfortune. Worldwide it manifested in Covid19.
As below so above, as inside so outside; our planet just dealt with us, its pain, in a raging illness, coughing us out, firing us up with fever to get rid of our oblivion.
Open your eyes. Discover what’s hiding in your pearls.
Act 4 Spirit - The magical aura of physical creations
Dream.
“They came to another grove of trees, where all the leaves were of gold; and afterwards to a third, where the leaves were all glittering diamonds. And the soldier broke a branch from each; and every time there was a loud noise, which made the youngest sister tremble with fear. But the eldest still said it was only the princes who were crying for joy…”
The “12 dancing princesses” was one of Grimm’s tales, capturing my imagination as a child; I was the youngest of the princesses, feeling that there was something wrong with our “normal.” Nobody believed me. I broke off a branch of diamonds to guide me through my life. Never forget your magic, little one.
Diamonds were named “adamas” by Ancient Greeks, which means invincible, indestructible. If they are properly faceted, they will sparkle in multi-colored rays of light. Some spiritual theories claim diamonds and crystals are storage devices of the universe’s wisdom, holding our stories in the spectrum of their light. Forever. The diamond also symbolizes purity and innocence, perfection, invincibility, force and authority. Cultures of the East found it protected and strengthened the heart, purifies the kidneys and improves eyesight, providing 2020 vision.
Diamonds and pearls asked me to wear a fiery red snake romper, shedding old judgments like a snake, the symbol for eternity and ageless magic.
The diamond I had disregarded as an old mindset symbol of women’s bondage had changed its colors. I saw it as the alchemical ingredient I was missing; an amulet against fear and evoking clarity in our global pandemic. I looked for the diamond ring I had bought myself a long time ago to reward me for a successful business. Out of my little safe it’s on my left hand’s middle finger.
Symbolism, analogies and metaphors can make us see a different picture of the same old.
The desire to adorn ourselves is ancient; our question of why we are doing it as enlightened beings is the measuring stick gifting us with new insights. Our new ethical How is our gift back to the planet.
Reinvention in quarantine times feels like heavy rain washing away our sugar crust and letting us discover the sculpture underneath.
Infuse new luster into jewels with gratefulness.
Play. Explore. It’s story time.
Wear your most expensive jewelry on your kitchen apron or pajama.
Go into your wardrobe without thinking about what to wear, put jewelry onto your naked skin.
Feel the gold, silver and precious stones, their forms and colors.
Do the fake and the real feel different?
Start with one piece that attracts you most and let it tell you what it wants to be accompanied with.
Does it make you dance, march after your own beat, giggle, stir up marvelous or uncomfortable memories?
Do diamonds and pearls make you a happy boy or girl?
Listen to your inner stories.
Sign up and/or email me if you would like to explore with us in a dress up party online.
Earth Day is on Tuesday, April 22, let’s give her the birthday she deserves; wear your diamond of clarity and pledge three Earth loving changes.